27. October 2008 by Shirley.

So I’m back from an incredible Bob Proctor cruise. I have learned sooo much information to add to my personal growth on this cruise. Good thing because I’m going to get the opportunity to put it all to good use with Charlie. Since we have been gone for 1 week and my mother has been watching my child, he has slip back into his bad habits. Of course my mother spoiled Charlie and let him have some  sugar and junk food while we were gone. Just the smallest amount of sugar and junk food seems to always affect Charlie in such a negative way. He also hasn’t been taking his wheat grass nor calcium/magnesium. He’s moody, he’s back talking, and making poor decisions. O….Lord, I guess I have to look at this as a big opportunity for myself to maintain patience and a state of calm well being. Part of me just wants to scream and shake him and ask him why would you not take your supplements when you can tell the difference being on them???? Why would you eat sugar food that alter your mood and memory???? Why is it when we leave you always revert back to your old ways??? Ugh!!!!

I have to tell myself he’s about to be 15 years old and it won’t be long before he flies from the nest. As much as I want to strangle him, I’ve got to keep being consistent in a calm assertive manner. The goal is to teach him to do this when we are not around, to help him not want to be tempted by foods that affect his hyperactivity, his immune system, and of course memory and focus. I honestly can say after all of these years on this journey the hardest part about Charlie’s ADHD, is his “I don’t care  or I don’t care about the consequence attitude.” It’s hard to discipline and stay consistent when you deal with this type of attitude. The only time he cares is when it’s something he wants, then he kicks into hyper focus. And if it’s a healthy desire than he will apply the things we have taught him. So that’s good!

Okay, so the glass is half full right? I can do this without losing my cool. So maybe it’s kinda of like starting all over again with Charlie getting him back on the right track. But what I have found interesting from these incredible speakers on this cruise; it’s not what you know, it’s about what you do with what you know. You can take all the notes in the world from great books, shows, DVD’s, or renown speakers all over the world and think to yourself, I have studied this material for so long and I get it now! BUT until you are truly tested and actually have to apply this knowledge to real situations can you really say, “I got it.” Well I have huge and great opportunity here and I’m just going to have to learn to embrace it.

Enthusiastically yours,

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9. September 2008 by Shirley.

Q: I was wanting to know, if your son Charlie just plain out refused to do his work or study? My son tells my husband and I that he is bored and just doesn’t want to do his work. I don’t understand. I don’t want him to fail the 5th grade. My son also says that all he can think about is playing. When I ask him why he doesn’t pay attention in class he says he is daydreaming. I can’t destinguish if that is the truth or if he is telling me that cause he thinks that is what I want to hear. I have asked the teachers to send some extra work home for him to do or practice and they tell me they can’t do that. Why? They don’t want to show favortism. Give me a break. I need to know, how I can get some help on how to get my son some much needed help? What tests do I need to specifically ask for,where do I need to have the tests done, how long should the tests take to get an accurate score. How do I need to approach the school system on this matter?

A: Yes, we had that problem with Charlie in the 5th grade (and he was on ADD/ADHD medication back then) with him not turning in his homework or getting his class work done. He never said I’m not going to do it, he just didn’t do it. He’s super smart and makes excellent scores on all of his test. Back then we laid down the law and that was that. I would get on the computer and see what was due everyday, then ask him each night if it was done, check it over, and in the morning I would make sure it was in his back pack. It was very hard on us and flat out exhausting. If we ever let up for a second, we would get an e-mail from the teacher informing us that Charlie got a 0 for not turning in his work again. He was in trouble all the time. We realized early on that he HATED to write and read. So when he didn’t turn in work we made him write for an hour. That seemed to help. But looking back I realize that we used fear and negativity to control his behavior. Not staying that you shouldn’t be firm with consequences that you give a child but all we did was focus on what he couldn’t do or what he was doing wrong. When we discipline him we discipline him in an angry state of mind, screaming at him, asking him negative questions, etc….

Once I started reading books (Wayne Dyer http://www.drwaynedyer.com/), DVDs (Bruce Lipton http://www.brucelipton.com/ ), and going to Bob Proctor’s seminars www.thesecretpowerofthemind.com, is when we finally realized how we contributed to Charlie’s behavior problems. Your mind is very powerful! Children need positive feed back to have a good self image of themselves. Whatever you feed, will grow! What that means, if you focus on all the times he gets in trouble in class versus the times he actually is good, that is what you will get more of from him. Build on small changes in his behavior and do not expect major changes yet. You can not beat off ADD/ADHD, instead you want to out smart it. ADD/ADHD can be a good thing. Put his creativity and hyper focus to good use. ADD/ADHD all hyper focus, which means they will immerse themselves into a task that they find rewarding or interesting and they will become oblivious to everything around them. So what this means, is you have got to find something that interest him or something he’s passionate about. For example, my son joined the cross country team this year. He likes running with the team but hates to run or train by himself. So my husband and I had to find a way to make training interesting for him. He loves the beach and LOVES to be on his skim board. We told him if he ran his goal on the beach on the weekends he can skim board afterwards with his friends. The better his time improves the longer he gets to stay at the beach. He went from constantly complaining about his training to bugging me every Saturday and Sunday morning to get him to the beach so he can run. He absolutely loves running his 5K on the beach!!!!!!! And he has moved up to the second fastest kid on the team. Even if he doesn’t make his target time, and we tell him how proud we are of him that he pushed himself running in that hot sun. We apply this reward system with his school as well. Your son’s potential in life is infinite, it just comes harder for him that’s why you must help him develop it. Find a reward system that works for all of you. Is he involved in a sport? Or any outlet that will allow him to exert his excessive energy? This will help with the hyperactivity along with Biometics Cal/Mag supplement. 

You must have structure at home (chores such as keeping their room clean, clean book bag, etc) since ADD/ADHD minds are so chaotic and again you need some kind of reward system. Their mind needs stimulation to release dopamine and serotonin. If not they will become bored. So when a child is doing well you want to reward him/her by letting them spend time doing something they love. A child and even an adult will feel competent when they have a high self esteem. And they become good at tasks or activities by constantly wanting to do what they love.  Make him think, don’t make the mistake we made and do everything for him because it’s faster. Don’t tell him what to do and why. Ask him questions that makes him figure why he should do something a particular way and why it’s a good idea to do it that way. You want him to grow up and be able to think for himself and make decisions that are positive, you don’t want him to go along with what everybody else is doing and follow the crowd.You can get these all of these test done on line: http://www.integrativepsychiatry.net/neuroscan_neurotransmitter_test.html This site also has food allergy testing, heavy metal testing, Candida testing, etc.. Go to the website and check it out. It will answer all of your questions and you can also pay a small fee to speak to someone who will help answer all your questions and read your results. Plus some insurance companies will pay for all of these tests. Here’s another site you can check out too: http://forresthealth.com/store/home.php Or you can go to your local health practitioners (like Centers for Holistic Health, etc) in your area and ask them for these specific tests. Some family practitioner doctors (the good doctors at least) will have these test available in their clinic. Don’t worry about that teacher, you can go to the book store and find work books that he can work on after school. Usually most teachers will work with you so shame on her for saying she doesn’t want to show favoritism. She’s just a tiny obstacle taking your eye off your goal. So don’t let her get you down, okay ;). Set an appt with your principle and if that doesn’t go well contact your State Board of Education.Enthusiastically yours,

Posted in Charlie's Personal Experiences, Questions From My ADD/ADHD Website | 1 Comment »

3. September 2008 by Shirley.

My husband and I bought Charlie a Rubik’s cube last semester. We thought it was something that would get his little mind thinking. Charlie only likes to watch TV or play video/computer games. This is because it’s an easier fix for him to release dopamine. This is why ADD/ADHD tends to hyper focus on things that they find interesting. The tendency to become absorbed in a task that offers stimulation and reward is called hyper focus. When Charlie is playing video games, our house could be on fire and he would never know unless we turned off his game. Here is an example of putting his hyper focus to good use, Charlie must have worked on that Rubik’s cube for 3 weeks solid until he figured out how to solve it. I must admit, I was pretty excited and proud watching him apply himself. Once he figured out how to solve the cube, he would start timing himself. He had set a goal to solve it under 2 mins. He would take it to school and work on it during study hall. This seemed to have started a trend with the kids in his grade. He said one day he went to school and everyone had a Rubik’s cube. The kids in his class started setting up tournaments against one another at lunch to see who could solve it the fastest. Charlie’s fastest time to date is 55 seconds. His average time was 1:20 mins. I got an e-mail from one of Charlie’s teachers. His teacher said he had taken Charlie’s Rubik’s cube up in class because it’s an “illegal possession.” You know, I’m not sure why a teacher would want to take away something that makes a student use his mind. I mean it’s a Rubik’s cube for crying out loud. It wasn’t a pocket size play station video game. When I picked Charlie up from school that day, he was kinda of bum out about it so we went and got him another cube. But the kids at his school are no longer allowed to bring their cube to school anymore. Crazy, huh?

Anyway, the moral of the story here is, is that you need to find what your child loves to do. Or if you are an adult, your job needs to be something you love doing. Instead of trying to beat off ADD/ADHD with aggression, use their ability to hyper focus to trick their ADD/ADHD into submission. Out smart your child’s ADD/ADHD and use it to your advantage.

Enthusiastically yours,

Posted in Charlie's Personal Experiences, ADD/ADHD Hyperfocus | 1 Comment »

2. September 2008 by Shirley.

Ya know, being a parent of a child with ADD/ADHD can be so FRICKING frustrating!! Charlie for as long as I can recall has always had this, “I don’t care about the consequence attitude.” This makes it very hard to discipline him and I usually find myself resorting to screaming at the top of my lungs. “Why did you do this Charlie? Why don’t you think before you speak Charlie? Did you ever stop to ask yourself is this a good idea Charlie? This is what I expect from you Charlie! Why are you always making poor decisions Charlie? How could you do something so hurtful Charlie? Why do you like constantly getting in trouble Charlie? You knew it was wrong and you still did it, Why Charlie??” This is always Charlie’s answer to me, “I dunno.” And now that he’s gotten older and hit puberty, not only do I have to still deal with his poor decisions but now I get these responses, “No body else has chores. Nobody else has to check in. Your ruining my life. It’s not fair,” And of course all his responses are served with high drama, eye rolling, huffing and puffing, slamming doors, and the evil eye stare down. I’ve had a parent tell me that I should put him back on his ADD/ADHD medication because that what she did with her son when he was getting out of hand. I said, “Why? His focus is great now because of the vitamins, omegas, and neurotransmitter supplements. Why would I put him on medication to make my life easier?” I would rather put up with his drama any day then to have him drift through life missing out on his childhood. Adding omegas to his vitamin regimen has improved his decision making process and maturity but omega supplements are not going to raise a child for you. And all ADD/ADHD medication does is turn Charlie into a zombie.

I have always suspected that both me and my husband had ADD/ADHD growing up. This explains both of our childhood and our lack of patience. Ya know, I had been so focus on balancing Charlie’s brain and body chemistry that I forgot something very important. I forgot to also focus on the emotional aspect of dealing with ADD/ADHD. So I began investing in myself. I purchase self-help books, DVDs, even regularly TiVo Dr.Phil’s shows. But it wasn’t until I heard Bob Proctor speak live in a seminar that I had that “Aw Ha” moment. His seminar is based on harmonic balance, having the income you have always desired, having a great relationship with your husband, kids, or friends, and being aligned spiritually and physically. Never once did I think that hearing Bob speak that he would make me aware of how my husband and I have contributed to Charlie’s problems and bad attitude in the past. I got so many gold nuggets from this seminar but I’d have to say the most important point I walked away is, To seek the change in your child’s attitude, you must first become that change. You have got to go to this website: www.thesecretpowerofthemind.com If Bob Proctor is coming to your town or a city near you, I highly recommend that you go to his seminar!!!!! If you notice in my e-book and all over my website, I like getting down to the very core of any problem. Treating symptoms are like sticking band aids on your problems. Until you can go directly to the core of your problem will you be able to fix it. Well, Bob Proctor goes to the core of your subconscious conditioning and helps you start from there. The way he explains your bad habits (paradigms) and the conditioning of your mind, will put everything into perspective. This information is soo powerful that you will be forever changed!!!!

It has made all the difference with Charlie’s attitude. Charlie started High School two weeks ago and his preparation, excitement, and organization are mind blowing. I’m trying not to get too excited but I just pray that this will continue for the rest of his life.We still have those “bad days” but for the first time, both of our attitudes are changing toward one another. I see all the mistakes I have made in the past and now chalk them up to good experiences. I take one day at a time, I do the very best I can everyday, and I leave the rest up to God!

Enthusiastically yours,

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31. August 2008 by Shirley.

Q: My Son is 11 Years Old and Has ADHD, What Would You Recommend he Eats for Breakfast? Also How Does Your Son Start Off his Day with His Supplements?

 Cindy 

A: Charlie is 14 years old now and will be 15 in December. The first thing he does when wakes up in the morning is take his an Biometics AM drink (1tbsp of Bio Fuel, Aloe, Bio Alert, Cell Care, 1 scoop Xcell Fuel and 4 scoops Get-Go-N). He follows with a big cup of water and takes three Neu-Becalm capsules and three OmegaXL capsules. He waits 30 mins until he eats breakfast. I would say about 5 days out of the week he drinks Wheatgrass and takes five capsules of bentonite clay. He usually does this right after he takes his vitamins. He also takes Bio Immune fives on and two weeks off. He will mix that up in his Biometics AM drink.

For breakfast he mixes in our bullet blender 1 packet of Biometics Chocolate Pro Fit (17g protein) with one heaping scoop of MaraNatha all natural organic creamy peanut butter in 8ozs of vanilla rice milk.  After his protein shake he eats organic French toast. He toasts 2 slices of bread from Nature’s Own Organic Honey Wheat Bread (No High Fructose Corn syrup). In a large pan big enough to cook both toasted slices of bread, he puts 2 tbsp of Organic Garden of Life Extra Virgin Coconut oil. In a wide bowel he beats up 2 Organic cage free eggs. Then he drips the bread in the eggs on both sides put them in a pan to be cooked. After both sides are cooked, he cuts up an organic banana or peach and put it on top of the French toast. Finally he pours 2 tbsp of organic Maple B syrup and sprinkles a handful of Walnuts on his French toast. It’s very delicious and a healthy choice for ADHD!!!!!!!!!!!!

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24. August 2008 by Shirley.

When I punish Charlie, I make him write sections out of various health books that I own. Sometimes I’ll print articles or studies done by universities and have him write those as well. He hates to write!!!!!!!!! I figure if I have to make him write, it might as well be on information that will educate him about his health. I wasn’t sure I was accomplishing anything with this form of punishment. Well today we went to the grocery store together. Charlie started telling me about how important it is to have various colors of vegetables and fruits. I was like, “Does this mean you are going to start eating more of these types of vegetables?” He was like, “No, but you should because they contain all kinds of different pyhtochemicals in them and it’s suppose to help with your health.” It totally cracked me up. I guess the punishment is working. I’m sure when he grows up he will eventually apply this knowledge. Time will tell I guess. Anyway, here is one of the articles that I made him write:

Reds When you add deep reds or bright pinks to your daily diet, you are also adding a powerful antioxidant called lycopene. Lycopene is found in tomatoes, red and pink grapefruit, watermelon and papaya. Diets rich in lycopene are being studied for their ability to fight heart disease and some cancers.

Greens Do you know why this color is so essential to your diet? It is rich in the phytochemicals that keep you healthy. For example, the carotenoids lutein and zeaxanthin that are found in spinach, kale and broccoli have antioxidant properties and are being studied for their ability to protect your eyes by keepeing your retina strong. Also, research is being done on cruciferous vegetables like cabbage, brussels sprouts, cauliflower, kale to see if they may reduce the risk of cancerous tumors!. Greens are also loaded with essential vitamins (folate), minerals and fiber.

Oranges/Yellows Orange vegetables and fruits like apricots and carrots contain beta-carotene. This carotenoid is a natural antioxidant that is being studied for its role in enhancing the immune system. In addition to being touted as a powerful health- protector, the orange group is rich in Vitamin C. Folate, most often found in leafy green, is also found in orange fruits and vegetables, and is a B vitamin that may help prevent some birth defects and reduce your risk of heart disease. Bright yellows have many of the same perks as the orange groups: high in essential vitamins and carotenoids. Pineapple, for example, is rich with Vitamin C. Yellow fruits and vegetables belong to many different families, but they all share the common bond of being health enhancing with great taste.

Blues/Purples Blues and purples add to your plate health-enhancing flavonoids, phytochemicals, and antioxidants. Anthocyanins, a phytochemical, are pigments responsible for the blue color in vegetables and fruits, and are being studied for their role in the body’s defense of harmful carcinogens. Blueberries, in particular are rich in Vitamin C and folic acid and high in fiber and potassium.

Whites Vegetables from the onion family, wich include garlic and any variety of onion, contain the phytochemical allicin. Research is being conducted on: Allicin, to learn how it may help lower cholosterol and blood pressure and increase the body’s ability to fight infections. Indoles and sulfaforaphanes, phytochemicals in cruciferous vegetables like cauliflower, for how the may inhibit cancer growth. Polyphenols, another important phytochemical that may reduce the risk of certain cancers.

Enthusiastically yours,

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3. August 2008 by Shirley.

I didn’t realize when I started my son on his vitamin regimen that he would need omega-3 supplements. I never understood the importance of an omega supplements for ADD/ADHD. So I began trying every brand of omega supplements on the market that I could get my hands on. I would experiment with each brand that had omega 3, 6, 9 for about 3 months before switching to another brand. I never notice any results from any of those omega products but I just kept giving it to Chalrie because of all the clinical studies that said omega-3 are crucial for the proper development of ADD/ADHD’s brain. Apparently the brain doesn’t develop as quickly as other children their age. Which explains my son’s lack of maturity and poor social skills.

My son has the worst dry skin….ever!! And he use to have the worst allergies every spring but that stop when he started on Biometics product line (Fast Start Program, Cell Care, and Bio Immune). But his skin however, was still dry. Well, I stop giving him the cheap fish oils with omega 3, 6, 9, and up graded to a high quality and concentrated omega-3 supplement. Charlie had been on this particular product for over 6 weeks. What a difference when you use products with high quality. His skin started looking hydrated! Yeah! He still had one rash left on his leg but the other 5 rashes have gone away since adding this omega-3 supplement to his regimen. After 3-4 months of taking three capsules of Omega-3 twice daily, his skin is supple and rashes are all gone.  The results have been unbelieveable! He seems to be making wiser decisions too. Although we still have a long way to go on that one, but I am gracious for any improvements! I will continue to educate myself or seek natural remedies to add to his vitamin regimen to make sure I give him everything he needs to develop properly. So stay tune because I’m all for experiments!

Enthusiastically yours,

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